jesuswelfare.com » Baby Jesus buttplug

Home
About

$

TOTAL SEXUAL ABUSE PAYOUTS FROM THE ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH

Nobody likes kids better than me. Not even that creepy, evil clown Ronald MacDonald. I heard there is cocaine in those extra-big, crimson shoes he wears.

Confessional

Sometimes we all make mistakes, but not me. I am the exception even though I am on welfare. I guess if I did have a confession to make, it would be that I don’t drink enough.

Jesus' Personal Stories

I lay it on the line for y’all and tell it like it is. Sometimes life sucks when you are the savior, but you always have to shoot straight.

Religious Wackos

I know my dad gets a little wacky with his fire and brimstone, covenants and punishments, but these people are over the edge. They are a little silly and here is their story.

Straight to Hell

Home » Children's Corner

Baby Jesus buttplug - a blast from my past!

Submitted by Jesus Welfare on Monday, 10 November 2008No Comment

If there is one thing that makes me happy, its thinking about my childhood. Those innocent years as a carpentry apprentice, before the megachurches and billions of annoying prayers. Now those golden years have been immortalized in the Baby Jesus buttplug from divine-interventions.com!

Swaddled in blankets, with a cherub-like face, this brings back fond memories for me. You can insert the

buttplug without lube if you prefer to suffer for Christ, but I personally like a bit of KY. My youthful features will stimulate the far reaches of your anal cavity and produce glorious praise for the Lord when in use.

These also make great Columbus Day gifts, too, because Christopher Columbus was an asshole.